Stella's Blues
by lildreamer7
Summary: Tag for Murder Sings the Blues...Stella watched them from the shadows with longing and regret. SMacked angst with hints of MacPeyton.


**Title:** Stella's Blues 

**Author:** lildreamer

**Rating:** K

**Pairings:** SMacked angst with hints of Mac/Peyton

**Spoilers: **Murder Sings the Blues

**Summary:** Tag for Murder Sings the Blues…Stella watched them from the shadows with longing and regret.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CSI: NY or any of its characters. The song "When There Was Me and You" is from High School Musical which belongs to Disney.

**On with the story…**

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_It's funny when you find yourself_

_Looking from the outside_

_I'm standing here_

_But all I want is to be over there_

Stella stood in the shadows of the hallway, watching them. Mac was pulling a tiny candle out of a Hostess cupcake, a sad excuse for a birthday cake. Peyton was standing next to him, laughing at something he'd just said. Stella stood there unseen, her eyes downcast. Her eyes glistened with the longing and regret that she so often felt these days whenever she saw those two together.

She sighed sadly and walked away, their laughter fading in the distance. Ever since she found out they were together, she'd learned what it what it felt like to fall for your best friend then just sit around and watch him fall for someone else. He was always right there beside her, but she could never have him.

_Why did I let myself believe_

_Miracles could happen_

'_Cause now I have to pretend_

_That I don't really care_

She wasn't sure if Mac knew that she had figured it out, but she kept it to herself anyway. She'd see them talking and pretended that it was a normal, everyday friendly conversation. Pretended that she didn't care.

But she did.

She did care…a lot more than she was supposed to.

And everyone knew it. Everyone…except _him_.

_I thought you were my fairytale_

_My dream when I'm not sleeping_

_A wish upon a star that's coming true_

_But everybody else could tell_

_That I confused my feelings with the truth_

_When there was me and you_

She silently slid into the elevator and rode it back up to the 35th floor. Their floor. As she walked past Mac's office, she couldn't help but glance inside. She had always enjoyed the talks she had with him at the end of the day. She'd be griping and complaining about her latest case and he just sat there and listened, hanging on to her every word. She missed that…

She missed _him_.

Lately, their friendly chats were becoming less and less frequent. What had happened to them this past year? They had been so close. The best of friends. When did they start drifting apart?

_I swore I knew the melody_

_That I heard you singing_

_And when you smiled_

_You made me feel_

_Like I could sing along_

He was finally coming out of his shell and beginning to move on after what had happened on 9/11. He was learning to relax and was even beginning to open up to her and the rest of the team. And his smile—his smile was returning.

The day she saw him smile for the first time in five years, her heart skipped a beat. It was like watching dark, storm clouds part to reveal a bright, beautiful sun. She had missed his smile. It was a wonderful thing to see after all he'd been through.

He was still learning to smile more, but when he did smile, it was usually only for her.

But now that smile _and_ his heart belonged to someone else.

_But then you went and changed the words_

_Now my heart is empty_

_I'm only left with used-to-be's_

_And once upon a song_

As she scooped up her belongings out of her locker, she heard them pass by the door, talking animatedly about something. She sighed, staring down at a small package that had been in her locker since that morning. It was a birthday gift for her friend. She hadn't gotten the chance to give it to him, yet. She stuffed it in her purse. Maybe tomorrow…

She stepped out of the locker room and headed down to the parking lot. As she stood in the elevator, her thoughts went back to Mac and Peyton. She wasn't exactly jealous of the ME, just disappointed. Disappointed in herself for ever thinking she could win the heart of the famous Det. Mac Taylor.

_Now, I know you're not a fairytale_

_And dreams are meant for sleeping_

_And wishes on a star_

_Just don't come true_

'_Cause now even I can tell_

_That I confused my feelings with the truth_

_Because I liked the view_

_When there was me and you_

She was almost to her car when she heard footsteps enter the lot, accompanied by hushed voices. She turned around and saw Mac and Peyton walking out the door. She quickly averted her gaze, but Mac had already spotted her.

"I'll meet you at the car," he told his companion then began making his way toward his friend. "Hey, Stella, wait up!"

The curly-haired CSI smirked. "It's a miracle. Mac Taylor is actually going home when he's supposed to."

"Very funny," Mac chuckled, coming to stand only a few feet from her. "Heard about the case you and Danny worked. Had fun?"

"Oh, yeah. Rich guy was drowned in his own swimming pool by his next-door neighbor. Guy's a Buddhist. Wanted peace and quiet so he could meditate."

"Can't wait to read the report."

Stella let out a small laugh.

Mac turned to leave. "See ya tomorrow."

"Mac, wait..." The detective turned around and found his friend holding a small package out to him. "This—this is for you. Happy Birthday."

"Oh…" He stared at her in surprise before taking the neatly wrapped package from her. "Thank you." He carefully unwrapped it and found himself staring down at a beautiful, silver picture frame.

The photograph inside was one of the team, taken at an NYPD banquet a few years ago. They were all wearing fancy suits and gowns. Standing off to the left was Don, his arms crossed, a smug smile on his face. Beside him were Danny and Aiden. Danny was sporting a boyish grin, his arm resting around a laughing Aiden's shoulders. No doubt, after the picture was taken, she taught him a thing or two about touching her. To the far right was Sheldon. He smiled shyly, his arms behind his back as if he were hiding something.

Front and center were Mac and Stella. Mac had his arm around Stella's waist, sporting a lopsided grin. They looked so happy together. It looked so right. What had changed?

Mac's eyes shifted to the frame itself. An intricate design was carved into the material along with some words etched above and below the photograph. The caption on top read: _A Night to Remember_. The words underneath were a quote by an unknown author. A quote that pulled at the hardened detective's heart.

_"A good friend is hard to find, hard to lose, and impossible to forget…"_

He glanced from the gift to the giver, choking back the emotions that had begun to surface. "It's beautiful. I—"

"Mac, c'mon!" Peyton called impatiently, standing near his car. "We're going to be late."

Stella closed her eyes and sighed. She knew this moment wouldn't last.

_I can't believe that I could be so blind_

_It's like you were floating_

_While I was falling_

_And I didn't mind_

_Because I liked the view_

A frown crossed Mac's face before he looked over at the female ME. "I'll be right there." He turned back to Stella apologetically. "I'm sorry. I—I gotta go."

She nodded, understanding.

"See you tomorrow?"

Stella smiled a small, sad half smile.

Mac held her gift close as he made his way toward his car. Halfway there, he glanced over his shoulder and saw Stella watching him with heartbreakingly sad eyes. Then she turned, her eyes downcast, her head hung low. He brought his attention back to where he was going, his eyes misted with tears of regret.

_I thought you felt it too_

As Stella walked slowly toward her own car, she cast one last glance over her shoulder at the only man she ever truly cared for. A single tear slid silently down her cheek.

_When there was me and you…_

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**Aww…kinda sad, I know. Love it? Hate it? Reviews are welcome!**

**Author's note: For any of you out there that wish to see recent episodes of any of the CSIs...check out You can watch recent episodes for free! The catch? You still gotta watch commercials...**


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